i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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