i wish starbucks made bloody marys
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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