Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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