once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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