He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
