I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
