It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
