i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
