About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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