whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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