there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
