As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
