Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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