Non-Jews are for practice
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
