garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
