just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I just want to make out with him forever
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize