She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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