youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
