come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
