you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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