There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
This is the high leading the old right now
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
