This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
So gin and wine won't be happening again
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
