do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
