You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
