you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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