i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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