Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
