Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
