I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I will be naked everywhere
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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