Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
