This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
