We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
