that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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