i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
