Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize
