I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
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