im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
