you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
