Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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