5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize