I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
