tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
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