i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
The power of my boobs compel you
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize