Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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