ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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