So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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