ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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