3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
