pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize