so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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